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Having a baby on your own

18 November 2019

Talking about how to get pregnant without a man in the picture isn't something that's really discussed. Society expects us to meet a partner, get married and have children the 'normal' way... artificial insemination isn't something that really comes into that vision. After all, the traditional fairy tale picture is something we've watched in films and read in books, but things don't always work out like that. For whatever reason, life might have made you think about having a baby on your own. 

The good news is that embarking on solo motherhood comes with options. You could have artificial insemination at home or go to a clinic. Whatever path is right for you, solo motherhood is a huge decision to make and there are many things to think about before we embark on this path.

Deciding to have a baby on your own 

Things to consider are...

  • Acceptance of a different route to motherhood

To reach acceptance of following this route, it may be necessary to go through a grieving process. Grieving for the loss of having a baby in a loving relationship. We aim to reach acceptance that the ending may not be as we originally imagined. It can, however, be equally as positive. Once this is realised, it is much easier to fully get behind the decision to pursue solo motherhood.

  • Support network

The more supported we are, the easier the process becomes. Support comes in different shapes and sizes. Emotional support, practical support, face to face and remote support. It is absolutely possible to do this with limited support. It is, however, more desirable to have a great support network helping us out. It is possible to build this network if it doesn’t already exist. We may not have a romantic partner embarking on this journey with us, but we can be surrounded by awesome people who can there for us in a multitude of ways to ensure we feel supported.

  • Finances

To become a solo mum, we will need to be able to fund ourselves through fertility treatment. Following treatment, we will then need the finances in place to support ourselves through maternity leave and beyond. The more savings we can put in place for this, the easier it will be to manage.


If you are in the position of considering solo motherhood and would benefit from further guidance on the options available you might want to consider Going Solo. It's an online coaching course that takes you through all aspects of the process to enable you to make the most informed and empowered decision you can.

For more advice and support please have a look at Mel Johnson the creator of The Stork and I.

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